Recently I started thinking about us, women. Forgive me, gentlemen, this blog post will be directed to the fair sex only. We are constantly looking for someone – the perfect boyfriend, a loyal husband or an experienced Sugar Daddy. This path can be intricate and time-consuming. However, I couldn’t help but wonder: are we becoming more and more desperate? And is the 30th birthday our expiration date?
I’m touching this subject not without a reason. I will become 25 years old in two months. Some say that this is the halfway point, others say that it’s just an entrance to adulthood. There are certain demands for marital status or a career. Most of my peers are happily coupled up, walking with a belly or a diamond on their fingers.
Led by the initial desperation, as I currently do not have a Sugar Daddy, I decided to find myself one. I needed to sweeten my life a little. After messing up on our website and long hours of constructive (and also less positive) conversations, I managed to arrange myself 10 dates. Meetings to get a sense whether there can be a connection and chemistry between me and any of those guys. The number sounds ridiculous but it was a result of research and my eagerness to find a partner.
Before those dates I did not consider myself a picky person. On the contrary, I was never quick to reject anyone. However, to my surprise, it turned out that there are some features of men I cannot stand. I don’t know who would desire a marihuana chain-smoker or mr. eye-catching-crooked-teeth. While some of the conversations contained a context, during others I was only enjoying delicious sushi, switching off the brain and thinking “Next!”. How did I become so desperate to find mister perfect?
I’m not short of money, so my desperation is not due to financial reasons. Although I do feel a little lonely, loneliness can be healthy sometimes. We sober up mentally and focus on ourselves.
Does my discomfort of lacking a partner come from the fear of crossing the magical border of 30 in solitude? Partially, yes. For sure, women love to be appreciated and worshiped. Sugar Daddies know how to spoil us. They boost our self-confidence, motivate and inspire us. I know, I should feel the same without him, but I don’t feel it. Despite my awareness of how valuable I am, I miss the sparkle. Excitation. “People motivate and move each other energetically – that longing is the strongest power and most of what we say to each other has no impact at all,” says my ex-Sugar Daddy. Why then most of the conversations I had were based on sexual preferences and fantasies? It seems to me that it reveals the aspirations of the person. Such men are not looking for stability, they are looking for an adventure. When I asked what piece of advice my ex-SD would give to desperate Sugar Babes, he answered: “Get a job”. Probably he was right.
The greater desperation, the bigger the failure. Take it easy, take care of yourself, maintain your individuality (so cliché). You don’t have to “have it all” before the magic border. As my designated role model Carrie Bradshaw once said, “Enjoy yourself. That’s what your 20’s are for. Your 30’s are to learn the lessons. Your 40’s are to pay for the drinks.”