2 Months ago I had only heard about the concept: Newspaper headlines with stories about how sugardating is merely prostitution and something to stay away from.
I had never considered the concept further. If I go on Tinder, I find it pretty easy to find interesting girls and my only challenge is finding the time. So how, 2 months later, do I end up writing this blog post?
Well, as with most things you don’t expect… alcohol, of course.
On a “business networking trip” (sounds fancy, right? truth being told, it was one week of vacation in the beautiful mountains outside Barcelona), I met Rikki who is one of the co-founders of sugardaters.com. One evening we talked about the concept, and I started to grasp what it really was about.
Spoiler alert: turns out – the idea behind sugardating was not an escort service! Instead, it seemed the idea was a new way for people to meet each other – often at different stages in their life.
But hey, what better way to understand the concept than to… Try it? I mean, I do like Tinder & casual dating, but I also love trying out new things.
So… Without further ado, I created my profile. Put on some images. Wrote a profile text… And… READY. I wrote 5 girls.
I got 3 replies.
I wrote some more.
I got some more replies.
On normal dating sites, I’m used to around 1 out of 10 girls reply. I’m not an ugly guy – I have good images, a nice profile text and I am comfortable around girls. But being on dating sites is just a numbers game for guys. It sucks.
On sugardaters.com, I was surprised by how many girls wrote back. And girls I would never talk to normally.
This was super nice – and everyone I talked to seemed nice.
MY FIRST MEETING
Talking to the girls was easy.
Finding the right “jargon” was difficult.
After talking to some (super nice) girls, I was offered with questions such as: “how much sugar?”. Now, replying with how many grams of sugar I plan to pour would proooooobably not give the result I wanted.
I’m totally fine with not only paying for dinner and drinks but also something more.
But… As a new guy on the site.
How do you talk about it?
How do you know?
How do you avoid hurting feelings?
Do you meet and eat dinner, or do you meet and fuck?
I had no clue.
I was afraid of hurting the feelings of the girls. By writing “how much?” you’re implying very strongly that the other person is an escort, which defeats the purpose.
This was difficult for me, so I resorted to my last resort: honesty. I simply told everyone that I was new and had NO idea.
Coming home from Spain, I set up a date with a super nice girl from the site. I was very honest with her and told her I had no idea what I was doing, and I expected she would help me.
And, she did.
She was SO nice. I only met her for some hours and had a GREAT time. We went on the most uncommon sugardate in the history of sugardating:
By acting like teenagers and sharing a bottle of wine on a bench in a park. After 30 minutes we were kissing and touching each other so much it was highly inappropriate in public. We didn’t get to sex, but let me put it this way: it was a super nice first meeting.
She told me what she expected afterward – which I found completely reasonable – we got it out of the way and called it a night.
And I was hooked.
This is the start of my story.